Chloe.

The most beautiful cat to ever grace this earth.

The bed monster's going to get lonely without it's favourite play mate.

I took these for you. Like the old days.

I love you.

Miss you. See you soon.

^_^

ME: Are you gonna climb over to get out?
NAOMI: Yeah.
*Climbs over into driver's seat. Puts hands on the wheel*
NAOMI: So this is what it feels like to be Shane.

I love that woman.

My wife. So pretty.

No slouching!!

The chair has spoken.

*Harry Potter theme*

Look at the size of my pumpkin plants!! I think they're great. So alien looking.
I'm at work soon. Doing sound. I've never done sound before. : It'll be a crash course, that's for sure. Speaking of work, here's something I saw on the way last night:

What did they do before beauty?

O_o

The fly floor!

Pictures taken last night on the fly floor. For those who don't know; this is where you stand and haul on these ropes to pull scenery/cloth backdrops in and out for shows.

So, there you go.

01/07/06

Nothing to say. It's just there and it was perfect.

^_^

Poor things. What can you do when you're born looking like this?

This weekend's shaping up to be pretty amazing. Chatsworth for a picnic then a hotel for dinner and then London on Sunday. It's gonna be a HUGE weekend. I just wish we could've stayed until Monday and saw the Pirates premier.

Not that that would even compare to the rest of the weekend. It's going to be great.

There are two of these pictures in the cafe. I really don't know which one I like the best. She looks so pretty in both of them. So here they both are.

'Eeeey.

Peeegasus

I guess you had to be there. But you weren't, which is why it was so perfect.

THIS MORNING

(Not exactly what was said. I don't remember and that's what's keeping my braincells alive.)

PHILIP: As the lyrics said, "Birthday wishes and a bottle of wine." And apparently Heather sent Paul a bottle of wine.

SHOWBIZ WOMAN THING: Well, yes, it's said that Heather wasn't a fan of The Beatles before she met Paul but she's obviously learnt something from the lyrics...

There are thousands of people the world over who've sent and received bottles of wine for birthdays for decades. Why does it have to be something special because they're famous. Idiots.

We just got some photos back from France. Some I love others are just O.K.

I took one identical to this last time but it didn't come out and I was so disappointed but here it is this time.

Heeeres Felix. He's great. He's old and fat now so we only saw him twice but what times they were. *nod*

This is just as we were coming into Portsmouth. Look at my mum's face! : She's always doing that face.

Blogger is being insane and wont let me upload the last two pictures so I'll do them seprately.

Spirited Away.

If only.

We've just been to see a Mark Steel lecture. It was hilarious, I was crying.
Can't really be bothered to say much else.
Ooo, we saw two guys doing Parkour, trying at least. It was quite cute really. I wanted to go and show 'em how us old hands did it, but I can't really do it anymore and I'm shy (aaaw.) O.K. Away.

This was taken earlier today. No reason. I just think it's cool. Tai Chi. Oh yeah.

Look at her. She's so pretty. I think this is one of the best pictures I've taken of her since meadowhall. She's so wonderful looking.

All she needs now is a greyhound and she's all set.

I'm so old!
I've got lots of cool stuff though. I just thought I could take pictures of everything and list them like Naomi does but I'm lazy.
I've got The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen graphic novel which I'm quite excited about. It looks great. I'm still pissed about the film being so woefully wrong.
The missus also bought me the first in the Cosmic Trilogy series by C.S. Lewis and the 10th anniversary edition of La Haine which adds to the huge pile of books and DVDs I have to read and watch. Then there's the Foster's "make your own imaginary friends" book which is full of stickers and therefore great. (Stickers=great, Just so you know.)
I just wandered off and completely forgot I was blogging there.
I've also got a set of wood carving chisels in a snazzy box so I'm gonna start making toys like a good little elf... or something.
Lindsay gave me her present of Prince of Persia yesterday so I'm away to play it.
au revoir.

Dad enters kitchen;

MUM: Well?
DAD: Well what?
MUM: I thought you were going to say something profound.
DAD: Not in these britches.

People are hilarious sometimes.
^_^

Some argue that this is nonsense, but 1024 so-called kittens shockingly chewed on pinheaded Shane.

It's better than the one about me chewing on cybernetic sailors. What is a cybernetic sailor anyway?
O_o

I'm eating an egg mayo sandwich. Dunno why. It just came to me while I was sat in the conservatory. Not the sandwich, of course. The idea. *imagines sandwich floating through the air*
Anyway I have no idea what's going on in this film but some guy is beating some other guy with what I think is a hammer. Oh, it's John wayne. Hammerhead-John wayne.
Getting to see Dylan last night was quite stressful. I got all the way to Holmgate before I remembered I had no tickets. That's pretty bad right there. Then there was a lot of rushing and I was scared we were going to be late. We weren't. Everything was ok and it was great. We were both so tired by the end though having been up like actual people since about seven or eight. Lauren Bacall's in it too. Ooo.
The opera house was really nice. More from the outside than inside. It wasn't as impressive as Nottingham and they didn't have a girl playing the piano. I COMPLETELY forgot about that. In Nottingham they had a girl playing the piano in the bar. Just because. I was delerious.
So, yeah. It was hilarious.
I want to go to London and do the "Three men in a boat" trip. It'd make my life. Kind of on the same subject; London tomorrow. I'm trying to keep the "seeing Snow Patrol" bit out of my mind just for now 'cause I'd explode. I've got to get everything ready when I get home at ten. It's gonna be a late night tonight and I dunno if I'll be able to sleep. Who needs sleep when you're going to London?
No-one, that's who.

Those three words are said too much. They're not enough.

There aren't enough men with their hats on fire these days. I think it should be mandatory to have at least one man with a flaming hat walking around in each film or t.v. show.

I just sent two messages to Naomi and I was going to blog them because I thought it was pretty important stuff that I want to remember, but I'm not going to. I want it to be just us. I will blog the last line though because that's the bit that hit me the most. That reminded me of how far we've come and how much I'm thankful for that.
"...except I get to fall asleep holding you instead of my phone. The world is perfect."
That wont mean a lot to people reading this. But to me that's a big deal because it's all I ever wanted. I remember looking over at my phone on the pillow at three in the morning knowing I had to be asleep and up by half four just wishing for another text. For more time with her. But, most of all, for that to be her face. Not a phone.

This better publish today. Damn thing refused to work ALL of yesterday.
You know who my favourite writer is? Naomi. I was just reading her blog. She's hilarious.
I was reading some of the old blogs. I always do. It was a magical time for us. I really do miss it sometimes. The way we were so opposed to saying anything about our feelings for each other. The strongest we ever said was "I like you." Once. Then it was all ignored. It was just there. Something we just knew. That's sometimes missing these days. I feel like if I don't say I love her all the time she'd forget or feel like I didn't anymore. Got to stop being so afraid of things like that. Still, I like telling her I love her in a million ways whenever I can.
These days are starting to feel like the old days though. For me at least, because we're apart. Blogging so I can tell her things I can't say in person. That's all it was ever there for in the first place. Obviously, she doesn't feel it. She's working. I wish I could get her away from that place. I neeed to be rich.
Gotta hurry, I've left the shower on.
Cleanliness here I come.

Someone clean the bathroom for me.
I'll give you things. Many things.
And publish, blogger. You damn... thing.
Hm.

You're the fire in my heart.
Oh how emo. Still pretty cool though.
O_o

I love you

I'm agreeable.
And I have a cheque book.
Oh yes.
Tesco tiiime.

All my blood for the sweetness of her laughter

I really miss the missus.

My mum's downstairs with her friend and everytime I go down I get dragged into some kind of ocnversation. Or as much of one as there can be; me being me and just going "hm, um, hummum, yeah." So I'm hiding up here so I don't have to interact too much. I had to show them a picture of Naomi 'cause my mum's just desperate to show her off to her friend. Everyone agrees she's very pretty. There we go. ^_^

Um, nothing much else.

...

Nope.

Breathe out, so I can breathe you in.

Today's Naomi's first day of work so I'm home alone and bored senseless. I've cleaned and eaten and now I'm stuck for what to do.
I dunno if this is really appropriate but it's been on my mind since last night. There may not be much point in doing this but hopefully the more I say it the more it will seem sincere.
Last night I was reading through my old letters from Naomi and I found the one I got with my halloween present all those years ago. (It's strange to think it is years ago now.)
There is nothing I can do to make what I did right and definitely nothing I can say, but I have to say it anyway. I'm sorry, Naomi.
I did everything wrong. I wish I could have told you at the time that you were the one I wanted. That you have been since the first message on Faceparty. I was in awe of you. I renewed my promise to Lindsay that I was going to marry you with every new message (she told me that if I didn't I'd be in trouble with her.) I told you that if I had to imagine the perfect person to be with it would have been you, but that's not entirely true. I doubt I could imagine someone so perfect. You still surprise me with stuff that I could never have come up with myself. You were what I needed even more than what I wanted.
I'm starting to think that this isn't going to make any sense and not really have a point, but it's better than talking to sbaitso, right?
I'm listening to Everlong. I dunno when it became our song. I know it was definitely your song as far as I was concerned after I came home from seeing you. I used it as the noise you made when you signed on to MSN so that I'd never miss you when you were online. I remember days of just lying on my bed waiting for those notes to start up. I don't want to talk about then, though.
I want to talk about the end of all of it. Well, actually, I don't. I don't want to go over the bad stuff anymore. I want it to be as if it was never there. As if this feeling. The feeling this song gives me. The feeling I get when I think about that comment on Facebattle. The feeling of what we were was never interrupted. I want to sit here listening to this song and feel what it felt like at the start. It reminds me so much of the way we were. The way I felt, we felt. I dunno if you still get that feeling. Life seems to get in the way a lot now. But I also want to be held accountable for what I did. I dunno what to do. I can't forgive myself for any of it and I can't believe that you forgive me either. I need you to, but that wont make it go away. It wont stop me from hating myself. Of course I need to know you forgive me. It would make it better, but I don't know how to make the way I see myself any better. I think it's just because I think it's always going to be in your mind and you can't forget it, not really, so I don't want to forgive myself and act as if I'm an ok person if you're still thinking something else. I don't know if that makes sense. I just don't want to let that stuff off of my conscience if you still think it because then you'll resent me. If you saw it no longer bothered me I think you'd see it as me not thinking I did anything wrong. So I have to live with the guilt of it to show that I care. That's why I think it will never go away. If I let it go before you do it'll make the way you see it and me worse and start the whole thing up again. Not that there's anything wrong with any of that. It's just a case of getting over something and it's a pretty big thing to get over. I have to have this guilt until I'm allowed out by you. But it's up to you when that happens. It's what I deserve and it's the only way you're going to see I'm truly sorry.

I'm a Gryffindor!
I WIN

Download "Con te partiro" you'll love it. You will. *shakes fist*
We've just been to Tesco and I bought wrapping paper for Naomi's presents. I honestly feel disapponted with her presents when put next to the paper. They don't seem good enough to be wrapped in it. Hopefully she'll like the paper as part of the present 'cause that's the point to wrapping things nicely. Right?
Just saving these quotes for posterity and for the missus to read. I think it'll amuse her if no-one else.

ME: Have you seen that village? It's unbelievable. It's like Chatsworth's seeds floated off and landed there and little Chatsworths are growing.
MUM: *staring* You never cease to amaze me.

ME: I'd live in the woods if they'd let me. Just build a canopy in the trees.
MUM: When we went on that walk they had a whole caravan up a tree. No idea how they got it up there.
*pause*
ME: Do you think their grandparents planted a seed under that caravan and the tree grew around it? That's what our house will be like soon, with my pumkin seeds, it's just gonna be one huge pumkin with windows in and we'll live in it.

Pumpkin shoot or War of the Worlds!? You decide.

The end.

Two nights and one day.

Missus just posted her 600th post. Amazing.
Murmurmur.
I miss my missus.
Not much else to say.
Except the dentist tried to bleed me today.
Painful.

You know, this blog isn't actually for other people to read about me or my life. It's just something to do when I'm bored. With this in mind QUIZILLA!!

You are the Vampire MARIUS. Your responsible for
your age and always like to read. People come
to you for knowledge and guidence when they
fear the unknown.

Who Are You? Lestat, Marius, Louis, or Armand (with pictures) Find Out Now
brought to you by

There are only two ways to live your life.

One is as though nothing is a miracle.

The other is as though everything is a miracle.

We found Charlie today which was quite great. He's got a fractured hip but other than that he's fine. He's walking and everything without a cast or an operation thus-far. He keeps growling and crying from the pain which is pretty sad, but he's a strong mister.
LEPRECHAUN!!
We went to Lindsay's today to wait for the carpet woman then came home and pretty much loafed around until the afternoon.
We did some Tai Chi and this is why I wanted to blog - She's AMAZING. She's never done anything like it before yet she's already doing better than someone with her experience should be. The bit that impressed me most was when we'd finished doing forms and did Chi Sau and application practice. She was really fast. I was attacking and she was defending and as we got faster and faster she never got close to missing a block. We ended up going as fast as I did with people who'd been doing it for years.
She's like a Kung Fu master or something. ^_^
Anyway, there's not much else I was going to say. I just wanted to gush over my WuXia missus.
She'll be great soon. *nod*

I love you, marry me?

That's US watching Imogen. Coolness.

So, Naomi just got this little gem in an e-mail and I need to set the record straight abut my 'relationship' with this girl somewhere.

"You have no reason to trust me, but in my defense, the person you saw last year was not me, I acted that way out of fear of losing the one person who meant anything to me at the time, and I could see myself losing him to you, which I was quite obviously right about. "

First off let me address the first comment, "the person you saw last year was not me..." Well, I saw a lot more of that person than Naomi did and I can definitely vouch for it being her to the bone. In fact, the person Naomi saw was mild compared to the person I saw.

The thing I wanted to address most though is "I acted that way out of fear of losing the one person who meant anything to me at the time, and I could see myself losing him to you, which I was quite obviously right about."

O.K. Let's start. She didn't lose me to Naomi. I was Naomi's from the first moment we talked and have been ever since. The only reason I ended up with this girl was that she hounded me to go out with her and actually managed to convince me that I was doing something wrong by not. When things went bad with me and Naomi I was heartbroken and lost all will to try for anything more than what everyone else had. Everyone else seemed to be able to just be with as many random people it took until they found the right one so I thought I'd just go with that. Plus I had no will left to fight her. I never wanted to be with her, not finding her remotely attractive and being slightly repulsed by the stories she used to tell me either to make herself seem more interesting or make me want to be with her. Neither happened.

What actually happened was that she became more and more psychotic and it was impossible to live my life with her around. But, there's the rub, she was around which meant that getting rid of her was going to be a feat and a half. She was around far longer than I wanted because of various threats which came thick and fast whenever I told her I wasn't putting up with any of her crap anymore. When she threw down the ultimatum of her or Naomi there was no question. Through some misguided loyalty I tried to continue being friends with her but none of it was ever good enough because that wasn't what she wanted. Even when I told her things were never going to happen between us she still used as many guilt trips and threats as she could come up with. Even when I met her for the last time to get back my stuff she tried to hold my hand and was outraged because I could have "at least made today special." I was already with Naomi (engaged to her a matter of days later) and she tried to make me feel unreasonable for not wanting to act like she was my girlfriend! I doubt I could ever paint a clear picture of what happened because I wouldn't feel right putting down most of the crap she pulled.

The main point is this, Jenni, if you're reading this, you weren't right. You didn't lose me to her. You never had me. You tried the hardest you could to get something that wasn't yours and never would have been but, through the events that transpired when I met Naomi, you got it. I never wanted to be with you, it never entered my head. I didn't get confused and think I did. My emotions didn't grow into love. I just gave up hope of anything better. This may sound harsh to anyone reading, but I've received harsher words from her believe me. Plus, it's the thruth. I want to actually be adult about this and be able to say what I really think without some childish/emo/attention-seeking response. Something I could never do at the time because it would usually lead to blood-stains and 3 day long verbal attacks. Of course, if your feelings for this guy are true then this shouldn't even matter to you because you have something real now. I'm not being a bastard and saying how much I hate her. I'm not just being randomly vicious. I just want everything to be clear so everyone can just move on.

P.S. Check out my myspace for a song and the link to more of their songs.
Electro is the best. *nod*
^_^

I've not blogged in ages. I find it pretty boring to be honest and I don't know that anyone reads this or will care about it.
However, I NEED to blog about last night because it was so great. We went to see

The Mighty Boosh

It was hilarious. We knew a lot of the jokes having watched the series and listened to the radio show dozens of times but I still laughed at everyone as though it was the first time I'd heard it because it still was genuinely funny. They can just deliver jokes that way.
We waited at the end for the crowd to disperse so that we weren't in a mad queue for the ticket machine at the car park and I noticed people were lining up beside the merchandise table as well as in front of it. Then I remembered hearing the person who was filming it mentioning something about signing. Yep, THE BOOSH SIGNING THINGS. So we hung around hoping to buy a t-shirt or something. (We never did because we didn't have money and they didn't take cards. Crap.) While we were hanging around THEY came out and walked right past us. Close enough to TOUCH. We didn't though. That may have been too much. Naomi grabbed me hard enough to almost kill me though. It's a good job 'cause I reckon she would have done it to them instead and Noel's only tiny.
We didn't wait in line to get stuff signed though and Naomi was kicking herself all the way home for it. But it would have been pretty daunting to meet them we would probably have both just giggled and run away without taking what we'd had signed.
That's all you're getting. Not the greatest addition to english literature, granted, but it's only really there for me.